Diana's Blog

So Greg and I (mostly I) have been entering creative contests, as I mentioned in an earlier entry. Well, I actually won one!...Which meant a good chunk of much-needed cash!

I did a creative advertisement for Alka-Seltzer (photo + ad copy), along the lines of a given theme, The Great American Road Trip. I guess Bayer liked it, hooray! It's very exciting to find a flat FedEx envelope on your doorstep, and then a nice check a week later.

Now we've ventured into amateur video too - for an Excedrin contest, and a contest for a Doritos TV commercial for the Super Bowl. (See YouTube for low-quality samples.)

Last week I had my first mammogram. It was really painless, and the tech who did the procedure was very sweet and friendly. Of course I started making jokes, like "Looks like a breast sandwich!" She laughed and said that a lot of joking goes on with this thing.

It really is like a boob sandwich; they place a breast between two plastic plates, to spread out the tissue so the image is more accurate. In the past, I heard other women complaining about the indignity or discomfort, but I didn't find it any big deal. It took about three minutes, and was less uncomfortable than biting down on x-ray cards at the dentist (i.e., e-z!). The cost:benefit ratio is definitely in our favor!

My wish is that mammograms were more readily available; it seems like people who can't afford full healthcare should be able to walk into Planned Parenthood, or any clinic, and get one done. I realize the equipment is $$$$....so even better, we would have more gov't funding go toward making this kind of preventive care happen for everyone, and much less toward missles, bombs, and airplanes. How about that??

For Halloween, Lori, Greg and I caught Jason Mraz at SDSU's Open Air Theatre. While I am not certifiably obsessed with Jason Mraz like Lori is, I am always SO impressed by his musicianship, performance abilities, and general message/philosophy. The guy is a musical phenom, and surrounds himself with the like (Toca Rivera, his oft-percussionist, Lisa Hannigan, etc.).

Lori and I used to hear Jason at Java Joe's, when he was just getting started in San Diego. What a treat to see him with huge global popularity now! Apparently he lives in Fallbrook, and has his own avocado grove.

I love having Lori for a visit. She's somewhat ADD-like, but she's really cool and talented, and I'm so lucky to have her.

As I gradually ramp up my work as a personal trainer, I find one of the most misunderstood things is how to stretch - and more important, how NOT to stretch! Many of us learned to stretch in the '80s and '90s, when coaches and workout instructors had us sitting like pretzels seemingly for eons, and then jumping up suddenly and blasting across a field (or pool, or whatever). Ouch! I always felt my muscles were sluggish and even fatigued during this process, until I warmed up into a movement pattern. I thought this was just because I'm the slow-twitch type.

...Alas, my body was right; the coaches were wrong! Most traditional, sustained stretching should NOT be done before a workout - only afterwards.

The New York Times explains static (or sustained) versus dynamic stretching, and why you should do static stretching pre-exercise.

While this article is excellent and accurate, it's only a partial truth; it does not mention functional stretching, or describe in detail all the various types of stretching. For a more rounded perspective, see my article on the various types of stretching, and benefits/drawbacks of each. I've included the movement prep series I do before every bike and run session, even before I jog or get on the bike. Of course, each sport or activity has its own lexicon of specific stretches and warm-up movements; a ballet dancer would not do the same warmup a soccer player would!

I'm convinced that I've stayed injury-free and physicall functional largely due to my core strength and movement prep habit. I also suspect that the reason I've been able to pop out and cruise through several half-ironman races this year with about a 50% training level is that I continue to do core strength and movement prep every day, regardless of whether I'm doing a workout. I stretch in bed and on the stairs in the morning, in front of the TV, in the grocery store line, wherever. There are plenty of "dead" minutes to be taken advantage of, if you don't mind looking a little goofy in public sometimes.

Five days out from a major presidential election, and which political controversy seems to be the loudest in CA? -- Proposition 8! I realize this is a highly charged topic, but I have to get a few words out there in response to the chaos.

First, this issue should not even be a political issue - at least, not in this century. Having a law that allows some people to get married, but not others, is discriminatory. Emotion-based discrimination has no place in the law. I don't care what your personal feelings are about gender and sexuality, or whether you're conflicted about your own; these emotions and perceptions are very personal and individual.

Second, the image of "children" used in the pro-Proposition 8 ads and signage is baffling. What do kids at school have to do with legally allowing or disallowing marriage? Regardless of the legal status of same-sex marriage, teachers and parents will continue to teach their kids what they will.

(Why is it that those who would control what others do with their private time and beliefs yell the most, while the more tolerant tend to show respect for personal opinions?)

'Nuff said?

Let's go back to worrying about how the country will be run for the next four years, how we're going to fix our repressed economy and our negative global image, and how we're going to improve our access to healthcare and education in every state.  

Despite the incredible inconsistency (or large absence) of my "training" this year, I decided to do one last triathlon. I knew I had endurance to finish, but what with the sesaon's various medical experiments, I had no expectations. I'd always wanted to do the SOMA Half Ironman, and it fit in with our plans to visit family in AZ.

Near the end of the ride, I saw that my bike time was surprisingly faster than anticipated (and no, I do not, on principle, draft off faster riders on the bike, like many athletes are wont to do!), so I snapped into a more competitive mode.

The first couple miles of the run always feel horrible. So I detach and let my mind spin through its negative-thought cycle, and move my feet. At mile 3 I warmed up, and suddenly I was running almost like I had at Santa Barbara - i.e., at a more respectable pace! No heart-rate or hydration problems - cool. So I'm hurting but motivated, when I see, instead of mile marker 6, mile marker 8. What the...??? How did I miss two miles? This is shades of the 2007 Baja 70.3 Debacle!

Both the bike and run courses involved multiple loops, u-turns, and bridge crossings. These are recipes for confusion in endurance sports! The antidote is to study the course beforehand, and to have screamingly obvious markers, and/or volunteers, directing you at every turn. To add to the mix on Sunday, there were two different race distances happening concurrently - meaning a ton of if/then statements. "If you're doing the half and you're on loop 1, turn here. If half and loop 2, turn there. If quarter and loop 1, go here..." Not so complicated in regular life, but the first rule of triathlon is, "Be the rocket, not the rocket scientist" - because all higher-level thinking stops when the blood is in the arms and legs and you're redlining on energy. The bike course was well-marked and well-manned (probably considered a higher priority for safety reasons), but the run was not, unfortunately.

I figured I was FUBAR'd anyway, but I wanted to do the whole distance I'd signed up for...so I doubled back across a bridge and ran against traffic to get in the two miles I'd missed.

Finally I'm coming to the finish around the right time, and I see Greg and Alex standing under the (other) bridge near transition, and I jog by and tell them I got lost...and WHERE'S THE FINISH??? They point toward transition, and I go, following the path and the other runners. --Four minutes later, I'm like, Where the **!?@! is that finish line, and I see I'm only getting farther away from it. I ask another runner if she knows where the finish is, and she points behind her. So I run back and ask more people, and am directed *across a lawn, around two UNMARKED turns* and finally to the finish line.

It's hard to describe the feeling of frustration (and loss of motivation!) when you find you're lost on a course. It has happened to me twice in nine years - is that unusual?? The very high exertion you're putting yourself through only heightens your emotions... And the last thing you want to do after swimming 1.2 (or 1.4 - even this swim course was long!) miles, riding 56, and running 13.1 is RUN ANOTHER MILE. I think now I'm riding the wave of having done triathlon training for almost nine seasons - some kind of endurance seems to be locked in there, even when I'm a slacker. :>

To add some perspective here, I commend Red Rock Co. for the many great aspects of this event - especially the laid-back, downhome feel pre-race, which they somehow maintained while keeping things organized. Tempe in October is warm, yes, but it's also a good race venue, with smooth roads and low humidity. --And Arizona is sunny, sunny, sunny!

(At this point, I'm pretty much jogging when I finally see Greg - do I look as confused as I was? At least I remembered to drink!)

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This past weekend Greg and I drove to Tempe, AZ, did a half-ironman (Greg's version being a solo, 3-hour mountain-bike ride on South Mtn.), visited with his good friend Alex, and then drove to Tuscon to visit with his grandmother, Cecilia. She is 93, yet is completely lucid and impressively mobile. It made me feel a bit sad, though, to see her in an assisted-living home with only 12 other residents, most of whom have Alzheimer's...i.e., there aren't many people to talk to!

Even so, she seems to keep pretty busy, with the structured routine, and motivating herself to take walks twice daily (wow!). It was clear, though, that her own loss of physical abilities and strength were bumming her out. I wished she lived in the same town as I, so I could be her personal trainer - there's no doubt that light resistance work prolongs and even restores strength, especially in seniors!

Her building is nice and clean and surrounds a lovely courtyard, and the staff is very friendly. But the rooms are small and somewhat dark (though there is a mountain view), and residents are gated in (presumably so they don't accidentally wander out and get lost). She did choose the place herself, but my personal suspicion is that her extreme frugality drove the decision. I calculated that she spent her very formative years in the Great Depression - and her sense of thrift is obvious.

The funny thing is, these locked gates are adjoined by a low, stone wall - low enough that I could push up slightly and swing my legs over it. It occurred to me later that many people see a wall, a fence, or a lock, and see the obstacle. The first thing I see is how to get past it. (Does that make me a good potential thief?) It's a good thing that I do have a strong sense of conscientiousness... ;>

It was very nice to see her; and I know she was delighted to have company, and especially to see Grandson Greg! 

Dad had his carotid artery un-blocked the other day. Apparently it's like doing a Roto-Rooter job on the artery that feeds blood to the brain. 

He didn't say outright that he was scared, but in reference to the odds of stroke or even death during this procedure, he said things like, "I wouldn't want to get on an airplane with those odds of crashing." He also took his prized Smothers Brothers records to the duplication shop, to have copies made for Lori and me; then he made my mom write down where to go pick them up when they were done. He also made sure he voted; when I called last weekend, he was studiously attacking the masses of circular information surrounding each proposition.

(Aside: I would have to agree that voting is up there on the priority list! If you're the progressive-minded sort, you might find the Courage Campaign's voter guide handy; it presents the positions of several environmental and civil rights groups in neat, tabular format.) 

...And he's doing really well. He spent one night in the hospital, and now he has to take it easy at home for several days.

Last week I went up to say Hi before he went under the knife (or plumbing tools, as the case may be). It was an idyllic day in Monterey. That still has to be the best aquarium in the country. You can't really beat that prime piece of - not just oceanfront, but ON-ocean property! We caught several feedings, including the one where the penguins line up like little pears in tuxedos. Sooo cute! (I know their beaks are actually quite sharp, but they *look* adorable.)

Hooray for Dad!!! 

Sunday's run was just under 15 miles on trail (my favorite way to run - and with no repeat loops, if possible!). It was a near-perfect run day, blue skies, light wind, clear, relatively quiet trails. The heat in the Rancho Santa Fe portion was balanced by the mild breeziness of the San Elijo Lagoon; I didn't even need extra electrolytes.

Most significantly, in the last couple miles when my current endurance (not solid, as a result of this year's inconsistent training and health experimentation) was stretched, instead of feeling mentally flat and just going through the motions, I felt a mental spark - a bit of drive! It was a familiar sensation that I haven't had in quite awhile...and it made me appreciate being alive. Months of continuing to go through motions even though I'd long ago passed some burnout set point had killed that drive; what a welcome surprise, to feel it again, even if just for a moment.

Today I'm sick again. I have this hate-hate relationship with being sick. Sick = can't do things, but also can't feel at peace just sitting or being, b/c you feel so crappy. The only welcome activity is sleep, but I never seem to be able to stay asleep when the sun's doing its job. (Even if the shades are closed, my brain knows it's time to be outside!) I've been sick way more than any one person's fair share - probably due to having an autoimmune condition. But that doesn't mean I like being sick, or that I deal with it well. Oh, I try...I have 1,000,001 ways to exist without feeling too parasitic while being sick.

I know we already spend the majority of our mental time in the past or the future; but when your present moment feels terrible, what's so bad about that? I think it can actually be a useful tool. I remember Sunday's run, when I felt able and somewhat strong, lucky to be alive and mobile. Then I remember that I never stay sick forever; at least, not since the uber-long bout with chronic fatigue in my 20's (which felt like forever squared). Do you think those guys at Alcatraz survived by staying in their present moment, focusing on the cold, hard surroundings? Wouldn't planning an escape, bit by bit each day, be a much preferable and likely way to survive?

I just passed the CPT exam, which means I'm certified as a personal trainer. I'm excited to look for work options, and to be training my roommate...but I guess that once again, I'll have to learn patience with the pace my body is setting right now. For a person inclined toward overanalysis (i.e., thinking TOO MUCH) who often finds that more action, less talk is a more productive paradigm, it's hard to sit still with a whirling mind...  I would so much rather be doing things than thinking about what I want to do!

To sum up the last month on the health front: Trying to treat an autoimmune condition is definitely a catch-22. As with viral or bacterial infections, or cancer, you have to kill some of the good stuff to wipe out the bad.

So I started the injections of Humira (a biologic immunosuppresant used to treat psoriasis and other inflammatory diseases). Unfortunately for me, my roommate's high school (she's a teacher) shared the latest cold with our household, right about the time I did the first injection. I didn't know a virus was coming my way (if I had, I certainly would've kept that needle in the fridge a little longer!). The first rule of Humira is Do Not Take it When You Are Sick or Getting Sick. Oops. Gretchen and Greg were fine within a few days; I wasn't back on the bike until three weeks later, having missed a fitness trainer seminar, a CPR class, a family visit to Arizona, and that much triathlon training. Well, I knew going into all of this that nothing is guaranteed. But, no matter how much I try to think Zen-like, I don't like missing fun or important things I've planned. Still, I take a rest, and then try again.

Also, a word of pharmaceutical advice: Don't let any doctor tell you that psychiatric medications have no withdrawal symptoms. Some of them will try to tell you that it's no big deal going on or off an anti-depressant or anti-anxiety med. Ha! Certainly, it depends on how sensitive your system is; and it's a given that most doctors won't even approach understanding of how it feels to be an athlete, and request a certain amount from your body.

Cymbalta (an anti-anxiety and -depression agent) was my previous experiment in the long line of attempted psoriasis treatments. It has been known to improve psoriasis, and most notably, relieve some of the itching. It did reduce the itching a little for awhile, but that was all; and the myriad of side effects wasn't cool with me. (High heart rate and low blood pressure don't mesh well with running or riding your bike! Plus, it made me bloated, foggy-brained, and inarticulate. I did sleep well, and sure, I didn't feel anxious - but my stress level has gone down like 90% since I quit my tech writing job anyway.)

So, cool, I'll just stop taking the Cymbalta (tapering appropriately, of course), and feel better. Wrong! With the Cymbalta withdrawal came continued bloating, and hello, depression, hormone weirdness and cognitive confusion. Talk about rebound effects! For a few days, I could barely keep anything in my short-term memory. It still looks like I'm pregnant (which would be neat if it were true, but that's just water retention). Don't worry, it's all coming back... but wow. I write this because it made me feel better to read message board posts and blog entries by other people going through the same thing. I know that in time I'll feel more like myself again. I'll post again as it happens, so any of you fellow med-survivors out there can take heart too.

Meanwhile, I've somehow managed to study and learn quite a bit in the last couple of months (not on the bad days, of course - but on just enough days) -- my Certified Personal Trainer exam is coming up soon.

...And finally, after years of working through techno-speak and translating it for the software consumer, I feel like I'm being watered with creativity like a thirsty plant. I'm actually having a really good time with a few fun, creative projects on the side...mostly entering writing, recipe and photo contests. Here's the latest mini-project (with my sister Lori and my husband Greg) - the theme is, Why do you need to win this Mustang from Valvoline? (Since we're really wanting to keep our house in Carlsbad, a new car for Greg isn't in the budget...but there's no rule stating we can't try to win one. :> ) Another contest my sister and I entered awarded $25,000 to the maker of a winning sandwich recipe, and some second prizes too. Two of our recipes were startlingly similar to the winners' - kinda encouraging!  

More important than any of this, really, is the alarming importance of the upcoming election. Without waxing too political in this particular forum, May the best candidate win!

"Not quite the Mustang she was expecting..." (The amount we laughed made our effort so worthwhile...)